School safety, security, and violence prevention resource

HERE comes the tough part for parents. Parents who have taken on the role of Safety Coaches. Parents who’ve taught their kids skills and techniques to avoid the adult predator, a set of principles and values to help their child how to escape and evade miscreants who stalk our schoolyards and neighborhoods.

IF you are a Safety Coach to your child, more likely than not you have made every effort not to frighten your child when you coach them.(see the last post).

BUT now it’s time to go one step further. You have to teach your kid(s) what to do if and when the Bad Guy (BG) actually grabs your child. What do to when everything you’ve imparted to them – things about which I have written in past posts – have gone south (things like being observant; ignoring the adult when he speaks; keep moving; indirect eye contact; never ever leave the original scene with the BG, et al).

WHAT TO TEACH YOUR CHILD TO DO WHEN THE PREDATOR GRABS HIM/HER.

• BREATHE, THINK AND THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH WE LOVE YOU. The BG wants you to freeze and become a “piece of wood” that he can easily carry off to a secondary crime scene.
• HAVE A PRE-DESIGNED PLAN OF ACTION. Trust me, if your child has no escape or fight plan, I have no doubt he or she will not be able to come up with one when the BG grabs him/her (First Touch). The heart rate will explode beyond 200 BPM and the child will freeze becoming the Ideal Victim.
• KEEP TALKING. The BG wants a victim who is not only an “inanimate object,” but also a quite one at that.
• INVITE WITNESSES. On the off-chance there are other adults or children nearby, let them know you are in trouble. “Help me, he is not my father!”

PHYSICAL COUNTERMEASURES: Delaying the Predator in the Crime Scene.

• PUT OUT THE FIRE. John Hall, the ingenious founder of Kid Escape, advocates that children be taught to perform acts designed to delay the predator’s ability to drag their victims away from the crime scene based on his understanding that the BG’s objective is speed, silence and inactivity. Using fun training games, teach your child to pretend his or her’s shirt is on fire and he has to roll on the ground to extinguish it. Roll away from the BG.
• HUG LIKE A BUG. “Putting Out the Fire” is a great delaying tactic, plus, it is not easy for an out of shape adult to capture the child when he is rolling on the floor. However, eventually he will catch the kid. When he does reach down to grab the child, teach him or her to roll toward him and quickly hook his or her hands around one leg and his or her feet around the other. Shrimp up, duck his or her head and hold on for dear life.
• SELF DEFENSE IS NOT AN INJURY-Free Activity. Yes, if you are wondering, the abductor, desperate now, will likely try to strike and kick the kid, probably will drag him or her along the ground trying to dislodge the child. Teach your child that the objective is to make the BG spend as much time and energy in the initial scene, betting that the delay will force him to break off the attack. As hard as this will be, and as frightening is the prospect, teach the child that the primary goal is to remain in the First Place and to never, ever leave the scene with the predator, even if it means suffering injury.
• TARGET THE NOSE, EYES, THROAT. Conventional self defense against an adult predator is futile. But Safety Coaches can teach their child how to effectively gouge eyes, head butt noses and drive a good Beak Strike, Web Strike or Side Hand into a throat. Great primary targets that even children can strike (or even bite) when the BG leans in to carry him or her off.
• HOOK ONTO TO ANYTHING TO KEEP FROM BEING CARRIED OFF. Children can save themselves by using the Hug Like a Bug tactic to keep from being dragged off a chair, a bicycle, a bed, etc. Grab onto the object and hold on for dear life. Make the BG pick you and the bike, bed, chair, whatever and tote it to his car. Grab a tree branch, tree trunk, Stop Sign, telephone pole on your way to his car, also.
• FIGHT HIM EVEN IF HE GETS YOU INTO HIS CAR:

Ø Make yourself into dead weight as he carries you, and, then, as he tries to shove you into the car, twist and spin and try to drop, just like a cat who doesn’t want to be held.

Ø When he opens the door he has to ease up his grip on you. Drop your head and upper torso forward and down quickly. At the same time twist and squirm, and for a second you will slide a bit. Now, quickly, hook onto his belt or waist with your hands and slide toward the ground. Work your way down and now grab onto one of his legs and slide down. I call this Drop, Lock and Roll. If done right, the child can slide all the way down the BG’s leg, hook onto the ankle with his or her hands, and, eventually drop his or her legs until he or she can hook them around the other leg.

Ø The Element of Surprise. The BG, if he is not expecting this, and, who would? Will be weakened by this act.

Ø If the BG tries to throw the child into the front seat feet first and is holding his around his or her midsection, the child can delay the predator again, this time by placing the feet against the front seat and pushing backwards. He or she can also grab the seat belt at the top of the apparatus and hold on to that.

Ø Hug Like A Bug Again. Once again, the idea here is to delay the BG at the scene and/or to make the BG break off the abduction by being a Bad Victim. Remember: Teach your kid to act exactly the opposite of how the Ideal Victim (IV) would act. Remember, the IV is passive, compliant, frightened and silent. The BG wants nothing to do with a “crazy kid,” who makes a lot of noise; makes eye contact; acts defiant and makes a loud scene. Here is your child’s opportunity to Make a Scene:

• Use the metal “male” portion of the seat belt to block the door from closing.
• Once the door is closed, but before he can seat belt the child (if he tells the kid to belt himself in, refuse), teach the child to “act” passive and contrite and to lay his or her head on the BG’s shoulder (after all, this is what he wants).
• When the BG relaxes, the child should crawl into the BG’s lap (I know, crazy, right?).
• And, ASAP, the child Hugs the BG Like a Bug, face to face. He or she can bite, head butt, reach and grab the keys from the ignition and toss them into the back seat. Fight for his or her life.
• The predator now has two choices:

Ø Allow the crazy kid to leave (Role Play with your child. Teach him how to unlock a passenger car door).

Ø Drive off with a Crazy Kid hooked to him, face to face (how far do you think he would get on the road?).

Until the next post. Stay Safe.

Hammer

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Posted on February 10th, 2009 by Harry A Widger
Filed under: Administrators, High School, K-6, Parents, People Involved, Predators, School Grade Level, School Safety Issues, Students, Violence