ASP: TERRIFIC TRICKS THAT WILL STOP THE DISRUPTIVE STUDENT IN HIS OR HER TRACKS.

KEEP SCHOOLS SAFE

January 31, 2009

 

ASP:  TERRIFIC TRICKS THAT DEFUSE DISRUPTIVE STUDENTS ALMOST EVERY TIME!

 

I thought we could chat a while about De-escalation Techniques that have humungous ASP – Asshole Stopping Power.  Less crudely stated, these De-escalation Techniques are actually tricks designed to convert a cursing, threatening and recalcitrant student, or, for that matter, group of students into a cooperative, non-disruptiveyoungster.  Almost anyone whose been in law enforcement  and Crisis Intervention as long as I have (you don’t really want to know), knows these tricks, has used these tricks.

 

I’M willing to wager some of you have used them with great success.

 

HUMOR:  Is a high-risk tactic, I’ll admit, but used at the right time with the right tone, it usually works.  Why?  Simple.  It is the last thing the youngster expects from an adult authority figure whom is being verbally assaulted.  The effect is a mental stun, which slows down the verbal assault and weakens the attack.   Humor displays calm, confidence, and professional self -control.  It works for me best as a guarded response to a verbal attack:  Try to use humor that attacks no one, save for maybe the authority figure him or herself: 

·         “F-ck you, asshole! (to security or resource officer)”

·         “I don’t think that’s really gonna happen today, Jon.”  Or, “I hear that, Jon.  You got yourself some real bad data there, but, I’m gonna have to ask you to —“

·         “Screw you, you bald motherf—ker, we gonna smoke here whether you want us to or not (once again, to security, with the kids smoking next to a “No Smoking” sign).

·         “What (looking shocked)?  I’m bald?  Anybody have a mirror?  I can’t believe it (this has worked for me.  In one situation got a 6’6” drunk criminal into a laughing jag, at which time I easily cuffed him)!”

·         “What the fu—is wrong with you. Teach? 

·         “Hard to tell with me, Mary Anne.  I’m hoping I snap out of it soon, too, but, still, Mary Anne, I am going to ask you to take your seat. Maybe we can chat about it after class.  How’s that sound (every word after but is professional language.

 

SLOW IT DOWN.  The youngster is trying to lure you in to a “pissing contest” with Trash talk.  Trying to get you to take the bait and lose your cool, and, therefore your professionalism.  Never react automatically, spontaneously!  Always respond slowly, methodically, thoughtfully, professionally (not personally). Damn near every major mistake I have made in life could be attributed to reacting quickly, immediately, emotionally using the Primitive Brain, playing right into the aggressor’s game plan.

 

SHADOW STATEMENTS:  You can pretty easily script what a disruptive students is going to use in his or her VAP (Verbal Attack Pattern).  I can come up with some, but I bet you can do a better job writing down a list of the verbal attacks you will face in the future.  Spinal Tune your mind and body to respond professionally to these attacks with a few great Shadow Statements that I bet will shut down those attacks before you can say Somerset Maughn.  I call these Shadow Statements because they should shadow, or follow every relevant verbal attack.    For instance: 

·         Verbal Attack v a Resource Officer:  “Tell you what.  You don’t have that fu—ing badge, I’m kicking your ass from here to the little girl’s room, which is where you probably go to pee—“  (Kid fully expects the officer to threaten to remove his or her badge and to kick the student’s ass).

·         Resource Officer’s Shadow Statement:  “I hear you, Jamie, but the fact is, I do have the badge, and I’m here, so I really hope we can work something out like two adults.  What do you think, Jamie?  Can we work something out?”

 

BE NICE EQUATION:  “The Be Nice Equation” provides a great contract between the educational professional and the out of control student, who is cursing, stomping, threatening.  This equation is superb for Resource Officers, Responding Police Officers and Security.  Here is this great Equation spelled out:

  • Greeting
  • Ask his or her name, of it is unknown.  Use his or her name as often as possible.
  • Identify self, if the student does not know you.
  • Identify the reason you are addressing him or her now.
  • Is there any reason why you are—-?
  • When giving directions, ask instead of command.
  • If he or she is still uncooperative, explain why you require him to do such and such.
  • If he or she is still non-compliant, give him or her options.
  • If he or she is among the 2-3% who is still uncooperative, confirm for the record that he/she is not going to cooperate:  “Nate, is there anything I can say or do to get you to go along with the program.  I really hope there is.”
  • If he or she still is in refusal, this is when you must take action!
  • Although another great option is to disengage from the scene, giving the recalcitrant student time to save face without you there, to retreat, et al. without looking like a “punk.”  “John, listen, if you and your friends want to smoke, why don’t you wait another hour and then you can smoke all you want outside.  What do you think?”

 

Until next time, Stay Safe.

Hammer

 

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